Me, myself, and I I am climbing through an underground tunnel, which is under Disneyland. There is someone climbing with me but I cannot tell who it is. I can tell the person is a male because he has spoken to me. It’s sort of dark in the tunnel but I am not scared. I can hear children screaming and adults stomping away, the noises of the roller coaster's strutting up and up till they fly straight down, then do sharp turns. At this moment this guy and I are up on top of a huge Ferris wheel it seems as if we have climbed all the way into The California Adventure Park. We are sitting, the chairs rocking, I feel a light breeze, a strand of my hair flies over my eyes, and he lifts his hand up to my face and moves the strand behind my ear. I don’t look at him my eyes are on the horizon, on the beautiful hues of purple, pink, blue, yellow, and white. I still have no idea who this person is still next to me but it seems it doesn’t really matter, I just feel comfortable with him. All of a sudden I am sitting in a chair in a business office with many people all around, snazzy suits and tight skirts. Everyone is furiously taking notes. I hear the boss man talking waving his arms around, I can make out that he is saying big. I'm guessing something he wants to open and he wants it big. Maybe, a store full of everything environmentally friendly and organic the new thing of this time. I look at the table, there is a notepad but nothing written. I look up there is that guy again looking at me. So familiar, he smiles at me, I smile back, I don't know why, I don't think I even know who he is but his face, just something about his face seems so right, like I've known him forever but I can't seem to come up with a name. I look down again and up he is gone. Where did he go? No he was the only person in that room that I felt like I knew. I need to find him find out his name. I get up and head for the door, no one asks anything or even turns a head. I am invisible. I am now outside out of the building, out of that rumbling office. I feel nice, a light breeze blows, and my skirt blows with it, and the warm sun heats my hair nice to the touch. My cheeks are rosy, lips soft. Then, I hear my mother's voice she is speaking to me about me taking out Toby. “Why? I think I took him out already he doesn't need to go again.” She keeps on babbling on about the dishes, helping...     “Why can't you just do things without me having to ask?” “I do its just that I didn't get a chance.” She gives me the look and I can't say anything because I know its true. Now I am sitting with my sister, she is playing with a Nintendo di that is a soft color of blue. I just don't understand what kids see in those things; they just beep and have really ridiculous games with little characters jumping around. I am tired, I lay down on my comfy bed, I think, I think about him, I don't get him, I can't figure out his name, who is he really??? I am with my friends, we are all so happy, laughing about nonsense things, talking about boys and such. I am happy but not really. I am sad very sad, very disappointed in myself. Things are nice. Right now. I am comfortable. I am happy really. I am with my best friend she is screeching as usual. We are at her house walking quietly up her front steps, she is looking around like a detective always making sure that no one knows where she lives for some reason. I call that paranoia. Now comes the naming off of things in her refrigerator. She really is trying to fatten me up I know it. I laugh. Sitting we are looking at a TV screen that is playing the best love story ever. The Notebook. Oh how wonderful they look together. I want to tell her about what has happened and how I am so frustrated. But she hates when I interrupt a good movie. I wait. I am now outside walking away from Mariana’s house. Suddenly I see him, the guy, I walk toward him but he seems to be walking faster from me. I open my mouth to yell but no words come out. I try again. Nothing. I run after him and he runs away. I run faster and faster that I'm flying my feet are not touching the ground. I look down whoa; I’m so high up. He is nowhere to be seen. I don’t care I’m flying. I’m free. I turn over onto my back. This feels nice. No worries in the world. I go back to my mother she listens and sometimes gives good advice. No other person I really can talk to about this. I want to cry but don’t like to. I don’t want people knowing I’m sad. But maybe I can show my mom? No I can’t. No. I am fine. I look at my mothers face. She is tan, her grayish blue eyes looking at me, her curly dark hair a frizz. She doesn’t understand and I don’t want to say it. I just want her to know. “Vaht is wrong?” “I don’t know. I can’t explain it.” ‘A boy?” “Yes sort of, but not like that I don’t like him. He is a boy who knows me but I can’t seem to figure out who he is but he looks so familiar.” “Vell have you tried talking to him?” “It doesn’t work. He runs away and I can’t find him.” “Maybe you just need to think long and hard about who he might be if he looks really familiar. Maybe you have his phone number?” “Hmm maybe I do. Also mom something that’s kind of weird is that I only see him when I’m alone and think about things.” “Well there it is it’s solved that’s how you can figure out who he is, by thinking more about yourself.” “Okay I have to go get your sister.” Alone. I like being alone in my house it gives me a chance to have some peace and quiet. My house is always noisy. I get out my homework but can’t seem to focus much. Maybe its better with all the noise. I don’t know.  I think harder. The past comes up when things were so much easier. You didn’t have to stress so much about needing to grow up and start being responsible as an adult is. You wanted to grow up thinking that it was going to be so much fun. Well its more stress than fun. But there are good times. Good times with friends, good laughs, good cries, good boys. It was good.  All of a sudden he’s here with me in my room, sitting on the floor, legs crossed like applesauce. He looks at me with his green eyes I look back. I don’t know for how long this lasts. I turn my head to one side then to the other. I wonder why does he look so familiar. His eyes are like mine sort of and his lips. He smiles. I wanted him to smile. How did he know? I don’t know.  His smile looks like mine. His cheeks are red like mine. It’s a little stuffy in my room. I open the window.  I think even more I want to say what I think. I think that’s what I think. He, no. Could he really? No. He can’t. But maybe he can. I’m scared. I think I am looking at myself well pretty much myself. Suddenly there is a huge WHOOSH of wind. Every thing flies, my hair, my, room, my clothes, my papers, everything in a circle around and around.  Wrapping me all around until it hits me right smack dab in the forehead. I understand what I have to do. What I have to figure out. I have to make a plan and understand whom I am. Figure out what I want to do with my life. That’s what I have to do. Then maybe just maybe things will be okay.