Dark Rain

by Makoto Yuan

The first feeling that greeted him as he awoke from his slumber was pain. He felt a heavy force, driving, crushing his legs, pinning him down. He jerked his head down and pried open his eyes against the weight of the pain that welding his eyelids shut. Yet there was nothing, no light entered his eyes, so his brain registered a blank canvas. He waved his free hand in front of his face, he stared as hard as he could but still nothing. He brought his hand slowly to his face and he felt a warm wetness and a stinging pain where his right eye used to be. He screamed, a combination of fear, and panic infused in his yells, again and again until his lungs could no longer. The echoes quietly died down, and the suffocating silence enshrouded him. His hand began to stumble around in the dark, and saw the world for him. His back was pressed hard against a damp slab of what felt like concrete, various sharp pieces of rubble and glass surrounded him, and a heavy stone sat upon his legs. He pushed and lifted even though he knew he couldn't budge it. A wave of desperation seeped into him and the adrenaline soaked into his blood. Sweat coated his forehead, and his breath grew short and rapid. He began to feel dizzy, and grew still. He was lost, and alone in the dark.

This morning, 20/20 eyesight, strong legs, he was waking up fine. In fact, he even pressed the snooze button for those precious extra 5 minutes of sleep. It was raining, and the last thing he wanted to do was drive through it all. Reluctantly he pushed off his covers and started his morning routine. He rushed into his SUV, revved the engine and backed up out of his garage. His boss hated tardiness, and he would be unless he managed to squeeze a 30 minute trip into 20 minutes. He raced down the 25mph zone at 40 mph, boosting through yellow lights, and “taking the initiative” at intersections. The rain splattered hard against his windshield, and wipers promptly swiped them away. The drenched trees, and tall buildings zoomed by in a blur. He had to cut people off, make a few slightly illegal turns, but managed to get to his office. He spotted an open parking space and rushed in. “Hey buddy fuck you!”, he turned and only then noticed he had stolen the parking space away from someone. He reached next to him, grabbed his brief case and jumped out of his car. With 3 minutes left he was really cutting it close.

Water dripped down the concrete and into his collared shirt. He had no idea how long he had been lying there, nor did he know if it was day or night. Minutes stretched to hours, and hours into seconds. He had stopped yelling for help after what seemed to be a few hours, and now he sat in silence. At first the blood throbbing in his ears damped out all noises, but he began hearing the ambient noises around him. There was a slow drip of water nearby, and the occasional fall of rubble. The cold had begun to eat away at his warmth, but the pain distracted him from it. His memory has hazy from the sharp pain the pulsed through his body, but he slowly began to remember what had happened before.

Just as he slammed the door shut, his boss spotted him “You were almost late, get here early for once” he grunted. “Yes sir” he said promptly, and walked towards his station “you damned prick” he whispered in revenge. His four years of undergraduate studies at Yale, and four years of graduate studies at Harvard had landed him a desk job at an insurance firm. Apparently they thought he would be the perfect person to help improve “company performance”. His job was the review requests and claims, and either accept or deny them. If it was covered under the company policy, he found reasons for why it was not. He dropped his briefcase onto his gray desk with a thud. He sat back in his slightly uncomfortable cushioned swivel chair and powered on his computer. On the edge of his desk was a thick green folder labeled “Urgent”. “Great...” he thought to himself, people just kept piling more and more work onto him. He pushed off against the carpeted ground and his chair whipped across the cubicle. He pulled open the top drawer of his gray filing cabinet and pulled out a yellow folder. He zoomed back to his desk and slid the yellow folder underneath the green one. 10:12, the digital clock on his desk shined. He pulled out two stamps, an ink pad, two pens, and drew out the first file in the green folder. “Ashley Graham”, age 68, sex female, condition heart disease. After looking over the file, he grabbed a stamp, pressed it against the ink pad, and pressed it against the paper. He blew against the red “Denied” ink stain as he prepared a letter to Ashley Graham. He threw it into the metal basket labeled “Finished!” on his desk. “Jason G. Thomas”, age 12, sex male, condition type 2 diabetes. He pulled out the “pre-existing condition” form from the yellow folder, attached it to the sheet along with a large red “Denied”, it too when into the “Finished!” basket. The whole process for each file took just 45 minutes, he had to find legitimate reasons for the rejection stamp, and then he had to sort out quite a bit of paperwork. It was very tiresome and troublesome work. The more he rejected, the more the company got paid. The more the company got paid, the more he got paid. This was the reason why the company also provided the free coffee he had in his hand.

It started as a low ache, but gradually increased until now it felt like a vacuum in his chest. The hunger pains came in waves, and it was only when it got almost unbearable did he notice his other pains were gone. He thought he would grow accustomed to the dark, but instead it he grew more frustrated. His hand fumbled around and grasped a small stone that fit in his hand. He tossed it as far as he could and listened. About a half second later he heard it clatter against something. It fell, bounced, and landed on the ground. He had been trying to gauge the area around him, it was all he could do to keep hope from dying. He felt eternally tired, but every time he put his head back to sleep, the hunger pains, and adrenaline kept him from the blissful relief of sleep. He reached around for another rock and noticed that the ground near him was a little damp. He picked up a hand full of what was next to him and tossed it to his right. Splash, the tiny pebbles and dirt sunk into a pool of water that had formed. The drip of water he had heard was now coming at much faster intervals.

He downed the rest of his coffee and tossed the paper cup into the trash can under the sign saying “Please Recycle!”. “Hey, long day eh? Oh I see you forgot to brew a new pot of coffee, no worries just remember next time” said a familiar smiling face.

“Ya... I gotta get back to work” He said hastily and rushed back to his cubicle. He didn't like talking to, or even getting to know his co-workers. He got to his desk and noticed another green folder on his desk. This time a sticky note was slapped against the front. “Please call to verify information”, it read. The folder only had two files, “Anna J. Ward” age 32, sex female, and “Bruce S. Ward” age 36, sex male, phone number “724-XXX-XXXX”. He picked up his black office phone, punched in the numbers and let the phone ring. “Hello?” a female voice answered the phone

“Hi is this Anna J. Ward?”

“Yes it is”

He explained to her the reason for the phone call.

“You recently filed for health insurance?”

“Yes I did, did I get the converge?” She said eagerly

“I can't say at this point, like I said earlier I need you to verify some information first.”

He read off the information on the file, name, address, date of birth, marital status, etc. etc. He then asked “Do you have any pre-existing conditions?”

She paused a moment, “I have asthma, as I listed on the file”

She's not getting insurance, he thought to himself. “I'm going to need to verify your husband's information, may I speak with him?”

“He's at work at the moment, could I verify some information or him?”

It would save him the trouble of calling back later “Sure, that would be fine” So he listed off all of “Bruce S. Ward”'s information. She kept repeated “yes” or “that is correct”. He then came the a blank space. “I noticed his current occupation is not listed, can you verify it for me? I think it was either omitted or there was a database error because it's not on the file”

“He's a firefighter” she said proudly

He's not getting insurance, he thought to himself “Oh... alright I guess that's about all the information I need, thank you for your time.”

“Wait, can you tell me when we're going to get insurance?” She said anxiously.

“I'm sorry but I don't think either are going to be accepted” is what he should have said, but instead he remained silent.

“Hello?” she said, this time even more nervously

“I'm sorry but I can't reveal that information at this time” He said professionally.

“It's just that we've been having a little trouble in this economy and all, and it'd be nice to know that if Bruce were to get...” She trailed off

“I have a lot of work to do, I'm sorry but I can't stay on the phone” He repeated. I don't want to know your story lady, he thought to himself gripping the phone in frustration. He looked at the clock and realized how much more work he had to cram.

“But, it would be such a relief to know that we're going to be ok” she said as if she was on the verge of tears.

“I'm sorry... I can't reveal any information at this time” He said trying to keep his frustration under wraps.

“Oh... I'm sorry to bother you.” She said dimly.

She knows... he thought, “Thank you for your time” and he hung up the phone.

The dripping turned into a trickle of water. He felt too weak to keep his head upright. He couldn't see his arms, or his body but he knew he was losing weight. The hunger stopped after a while, and now it was hard to even lift his arm. He was surprised about how he still managed to hold his sanity, he had heard stories of people losing it in solitary confinement. At least they knew that they'd eventually be released though. He had gauged that the height of his drop was about ten meters from his stone throwing gauge. It was strange, He only want out to his car to pick up some paperwork.

His phone rang, “Hello?” he answered

“Hello daddy!” a 10 year old girl's voice rang in the phone.

“Hi sweetheart how're you!” He said enthusiastically.

“I'm fine, mommy wanted to talk to you” She giggled.

“Just checking in on when I can expect you home.” his wife said.

“I should be back by seven, I've been swamped by work today” He said exasperated.

“Anything happen?” she said worried.

“People pushed a lot of work on me, and I just got off the phone with this lady who I knew wasn't going to get health insurance. She kept trying to tell me her story, but I can't deal with it.” He said. He learned his lessons early, get too attached to the people and it hurts. He tried to shut himself off so he could do his work.

“I'm sorry, could you pick up her medication on your way back?” She asked sympathetically.

“Ya, I will, I'll see you later.”

“Love you” she said.

“I lo-” The ground disappeared.

He let out a quiet sigh, and finally found a comfortable position on the concrete slab. The rush of water now resonated through the air, and the ice cold wetness crept up onto him. He leaned his head back, and felt the fatigue overcome him as he finally adjusted to the dark.