by Tenzin Choedin

Growing up as a child you are taught by your parents and teachers that life is race. If you don’t run fast, somebody else will run faster and take it over.

Five years ago when I was in India, my brother Ngawang Passang told me a story that changed his whole life and also mine after hearing it. Ngawang was also taught that life is a race, you have to run fast or somebody else will. Ngawang was tall, dark skin with curly hair wearing glasses looking very nerdish. He loves taking pictures, especially animals. He wanted to be wild life photographer. However when he was born, the first sentence his father said was, “my son is going to be a engineer.” Ever since than he had no freedom, he doesn’t like engineering, but he was scare to tell his father. So, he decided to be an engineer.

Ngawang Passang went to ICE (Imperial College For Engineering). ICE is a number one college in India. The first day of the school, all the freshman students were called in the theater. There they saw the director of school whom was also their professor. He is fat with gray curly hair and looks very mean. He brought a net and a bird in the theater and asked,

“ What is this?”

“ That’s a net,” a student answered.

“ Whom? ” professor asked.

“ Bird, “ same student answered

“ Wrong, bird never lie her egg in her nest, they throw away others. So the nest can be all theirs.” Professor said and everybody looked at each other not really understanding what he was talking about. Then he said.

“ Don’t forget because every year there’s 400,000 applications come to ICE, but only two hundred people gets elected and that is you. My daughter also applied for three years but rejected every time. So remember life is race, you have to run faster than others to achieve success.”

Every body was really touch by professor speech and wanted to work harder. However there was this one person, who was laughing at professor speech.

His name is Rancho and he happens to be Ngawang roommate. Ngawang didn’t like Rancho at first but later he was the one who changed his life. Rancho was short light skin with chubby face. He was different than us; there was something special about him. Unlike us, he wasn’t scare or nervous about how his future is going to be. He came to college because he wanted to study and get as much knowledge as he can. We were following the professor like a machine, but he was the only one who wasn’t machine. However he loved machine, wherever he finds machine. He opens it and tries to put it back. Sometimes it work and sometimes it don’t.

There was this one other person name Joy who also loved machines. One day he went to professor office to ask for the conviction dates.

“ Why you want to know the conviction dates? ” professor ask.

“ My dad wants to make a reservation, I am the first engineer from my village,” Joy said.

“ In that case, call your dad,” professor said.

He happily called and the professor said to his dad,

“ Sir this year your son won’t graduate because he has violated all the date lines. It is unrealistic project, I told him. He is making some nonsense Helicopter. It is my recommendation that you don’t make the reservation, I am sorry.”

His dad was very sad.

“ Sir I am this close, just check it out,” joy said it desirably wanting him to check.

“ Is your project ready? If it is, submit it, we will concentrate on it,” professor said carelessly.

“ Sir give me some extension,” joy begged.

“ Why should I give you extension Mr. Joy? Sunday afternoon my son died on a train accident and Monday morning I was giving lecture. I can give you sympathy not extension,” professor said angrily.

Rancho and Ngawang heard the conversation and Rancho told joy he would help him with making the helicopter fly. However was very sad and lost his hop.

“ My whole life I work hard,

Let me live peacefully for once,

Give me some sunshine God,

Give me another chance,

I want to grow up once again,” Joy said it tears coming out of his eyes and threw the Helicopter.

Rancho felt sorry for him and decided to fix the helicopter for him. It took him couple day to fix it and than one day Ngawang and him went to the Joy’s room to surprise him. However when they open the door, they saw Joy hanged himself and on the wall he wrote “ I Quit.”

They all went to the funeral feeling very sad and sorry for his parents to lose a nice son like him. It was a rainy day at that time and the professor was also there. Rancho was very mad at the professor and Ngawang try to stop him, but he went to the professor.

“ Good news sir, everybody this is a suicide, but this is a murder,” rancho said angrily.

Professor looked angrily back to him and then left. The next day during school the professor called Rancho to the office. Ngawang was outside listening.

“ So you are blaming me for Joy suicide. One student can’t take the pressure and you are going to blame it on me. Every students will have many pressure and are you going to blame it on the others all the time!” professor said smacking his desk.

“ I wasn’t blaming you sir, I was talking about the system. I have a statistic here sir and India is number one suicide. In every 1.5 hours a student commits a suicide. They die in suicide more than disease. So there is something wrong going on right sir,” rancho said.

“ I don’t know about the other college, but this is one of the finest college in the country! I am running this college since thirty-two years and from twenty position, I brought this college to number one!” professor said angrily.

“ What number one sir? Nobody talks about new ideas, the teacher only talks about how to get good marks or about job in the U.S. Nobody is getting educated we are only getting taught on how to get good marks,” rancho said hoping the professor would understand.

“ You are going to teach us how to teach!” professor said angrily.

“ No sir you can teach better than me, I was telling you how to teach. Sir if you keeping teaching like that, the students knowledge won’t get better, their pressure will increase. It’s a college, not a pressure cooker. Even animals learn how to sit on the chair because of the pressure of getting hit by the trainer, but we call that well trained, not well educated. With the smile on the face, I am sure you will learn that someday,” he said and ran away.

When he opens the door, the professor saw Ngawang on the door and he also ran away with him. Ngawang really like how he thinks and the way he live his life.

The professor was really angry and since Rancho and Ngawang is a roommate. He sent a letter to Ngawang’s parent saying your son is going on wrong path because of his roommate and best friend Rancho. If he don’t choose the right path, his future can be ruined”.

So Ngawang parents invite rancho home and took him to Ngawang’s room and said,

“ We could afford only one A/C and we didn’t put that in our room, we put that in his room. So he can study in peace. I never bought a car, I still ride my motorbike because I spent all my money in his college. I sacrifice my life for his future, you understand that”.

Rancho was looking at the pictures on the wall and wasn’t even paying attention to his father. All of sudden he said,

“ Your pictures are really good, you should be a photographer not a engineer. You are not going to be a good engineer, you suck in engineering”.

“ Shut up” Ngawang whispered.

“ Uncle why don’t you let him be a wild life photographer, he will be a great one,” Rancho said.

“ Please don’t ruin my son’s life and get out of here!” Ngawang father said.

Rancho still trying to convince to Ngawang’s father, but Ngawang cover Rancho’s mouth and took him outside. Later they went to the bar. They both were in there very drunk and Ngawang said,

“ I want to kill that mother fucking professor, he just made my life worse than it is.’

“ Na na na, don’t blame it on the professor, blame it on yourself you pussy. You know engineering is not your strength or the thing you like to do. Photographer is your strength and your weakness is that you can’t tell that to your parents. You will never achieve anything but regret if you stay scare like this,” rancho said.

“ I know I can’t tell that to my parents but you don’t have a right to call me pussy, you little pussy. You like the professor daughter, but you are scare of the professor. If you can tell her you like her, I will tell my parents I don’t want to be engineer,” Ngawang said.

“ Ok,” Rancho said and they went to the professor house.

So, they were very drunk and went to talk to the professor daughter. Rancho went to her room and told her he likes her, but she slapped and rejected him. Good thing she didn’t tell her father and told him to leave. Ngawang was really mad he got rejected. Rancho left and Ngawang was outside at the gate, screamed, “fuck you!” and piss on the gate. Unluckily professor saw it and he was caught in the camera.

So the next day, the professor called Ngawang to the office and ask him to type a letter saying, it is my painful duty to inform you that your son is rustigated from ICE.

Ngawang try to apologize and ask for another chance. He said his parents will die if they hear about this.

“ Did you think that when you was pissing on my door,” professor said.

“ Sir please, one more chance, my parents sacrifice their future for mine,” Ngawang said tearing coming out of his eyes.

“ Ok remove your name and write Rancho name and be my witness. I won’t throw you out from college. I know he was there. You have five minutes to think about it,” professor said and went to the bathroom.

While professor was in the bathroom, he heard some glass breaking sound. He went outside to check it and it was Ngaawang. He jumped of the building and try to commit suicide because he didn’t know what else to do. Rancho was his best friend and his parents probably have same dream as my parents do to me and it wouldn’t be right if I blame it on him. In the other hand he didn’t want to hurt his parents. So without thinking much, he just jumped off the building. They took him to the hospital and luckily he was alive. The doctor said because of the shock, his body is paralyze, but his mind is working. He can see and hear us. Make him happy and he will get better.

With anger Rancho went to the principle office and said, “ This is what I am talking about sir, you teacher put too much pressure and look what happen, another student try to commit suicide, god dammit!”

Professor felt very bad and apologize. Rancho asked him to come with him to the hospital and tell him, he won’t be thrown out of college. Rancho also told Ngawang parents to let him be whatever he wants. Because of you, look what he did today. Ngawang parents felt very bad. So, Rancho took everybody to the hospital to try to get Ngawang happy and get better soon.

Ngawang felt Rancho hard work and was very happy and got better after couple months. Later everybody was very happy and couple months later they graduated. They were having party after the graduation in Ngawang’s house. Rancho went outside and was crossing the street to get some sweet, but while crossing. He didn’t see the big truck coming and the truck ran over him. And rancho was dead.

Everybody was very sad and on that day everybody, specifically Ngawang learned that, in life don’t go after success, go after excellence. Success will come after you. Do what you love to do, not what other want you to do.